A second look…

Prelude -I decided to re-share a blog post from the pages of my 2013 journey. It is not very often that I return to writings from past years and whether I stumbled across this or it fell into my lap it was fitting and worth a review and share.

Never be afraid to bring something that does not fulfill, strengthen or empower you to a close. Don’t sit by and allow yourself to be drained empty, close that chapter and start anew.

There are far too many of us selling ourselves short by staying in unfulfilled relationships, at dead end jobs, nurturing associations that are one sided, keeping silent at your own expense, or _______ (fill in the blank) and these are the very things that will pull us under as we continue to be slapped around repeatedly by endless tides.

Please, don’t misunderstand me this isn’t supposed to be easy, anything worth effort rarely is and, after all, you’ve built “it” up, made “it” bigger than life, given “it” your power…ask yourself, really is the “it” all that?

If life is to be lived without regret than you must at some point be willing to fly without a parachute, without a safety net. Go ahead, take a deep breath, jump off the high dive and yes, you should expect to get wet, drenched, maybe even swallow a gallon or more. However, if you’re willing to fight, kick and kick some more…you will survive. And that is the point of it all.

Be the Phoenix in the flame, the heroine of your story, the role model instead of the model, you are your story. All that is required now is for you believe in you!

Take the next step…Forward!

Enjoy the view and make every action count

*My apologies, but I was unable to post on January 1 as expected. Expect a second post before days end. 

There will be days with which struggle is inevitable, the key to winning is “keeping your head in the game.” Successful people are those who never give up. Instead, they implore tools they’ve acquired, and they look at obstacles or roadblocks with an optimistic perspective rather than eyes of defeat.

In life, it can’t always be about winning, because failure or coming up short, is the main ingredient of any success story.

 

My story of success has been painted with the obvious markings of blood, sweat, and an ample amount of salty tears (mostly my own). I can say with certainty that I’ve never settled; however, I like others have stood in the second best position and chose to use that as my motivation. Moving forward, I will always choose the view ahead of me, I will anticipate obstacles, and I will focus on my goals; without forgetting about or dwelling on what lies behind me. I can always call up and reference my past as needed, but I refuse to allow myself to get stuck or encumbered by my past choices or actions.

Welcome to my “Alpha.”

 

 

 

Sorry…”I just can’t!”

Last week was a tough one. Tonight, or rather this early morning as I sat here thinking of an act that blind-sighted me and nearly caused me to lose my footing, I begin to ponder does every wrong action against you truly deserve forgiveness? Nope, and I do not embrace the philosophy that an apology of “I’m sorry” must be rewarded with openness or a forgiving smile.

I have been known to reject more than a few apologies, even when the person appeared on the surface to be sincere, yet repeated  a previous or similar offense. I am of the opinion that an apology means “I erred and it won’t be repeated” the problem with that is too often it is repeated and “I’m sorry” just becomes fallen words. A phrase that individuals seemingly can utter without even a passing thought or hesitation.  

Certainly, I understand that many choose to believe or see forgiveness is about and for the “individual” and not necessarily the perpetrator, yet we believe in and give so much of our personal power to numerous other fallacies, rather than thinking and standing our ground…we become untrue to ourselves and placate to the thoughts of others.

Me, I “will” be true to myself, to forgive myself for having a trusting heart and believing that good people exist (they do) and allowing things I have no control over to “steal my joy”and that is “power” enough for me to move forward.

Forgive yourself for your faults and your mistakes and move on.

Les Brown

Read more at http://www.brainyquote.com/quotes/keywords/forgive.html#ErjOiXOcJYkaDeA0.99

Today, was just not my day…

There are days when you have to admit you just SUCK and you know it!

Today was that day for me…I awoke early or rather my sleep was interrupted several times early in the morning before I finally decided that it was time to be awake. I grabbed my phone and cruised through Facebook looking at the time 0630 I decided to pass on going to the gym and continued to Facebook.

After an hour or so, I finally pushed myself to a standing position and dragged my rebelling body downstairs to my craft studio. We are in the midst of revamping the space to make it more efficient, productive, and collaborative workspace for two of the three craft styles that I currently spend lots of money on.

After being up for a few hours and getting a what appeared to be very little done…I was exhausted and decided that I should go back to bed (I believe it was 0930). I slept until noon-thirty before being summoned to raise by the man of the house (my spouse), we had made plans to go out and look at shelving to hold my Cricuts and printer.

 

So, you might be wondering where does the I SUCK come into play. I just felt like I had the worst attitude all day. I could have been argumentative, but detecting my bad mood I opted to remain silent or say very little in disagreement as it was not my intention. I was anything, but my usual “Rebecca of Sunnybrook Farm” self and I feel horrid. I am grateful to have such a loving and understanding spouse…who never once complained that I was short, abrupt, or mean.

I apologized in advance, but in my heart I still felt bad about my disposition.

Our Intimacy…

It was an early Sunday morning, we lay side by side with only the street light illuminating the interior of the room. My dark meaty pecan leg stretched out and nestled atop his olive tinted thigh, his hand lay on my thigh creating a gentle warmth that said, “I’ll always be here to protect you”…this was our intimacy and I loved sharing it with him here in the early morning silence of our bedroom where the only sounds came from the hum of the fans and the gentle sounds of his slumbered breathing.

Sharing my story…

OMG…that’s my quote! That is a quote I found in my teens and treasured throughout my early thirties. When I heard it being read to me today, quoted out loud, I stood frozen in that moment of time and then I begin searching for that girl that girl I knew I’d lost somewhere along my journey. Admittedly, I was sad at the thought of losing myself…until she tapped my shoulder and as I turned to face her she broke into a full face smile and beamed. She leaned in close to me and whispered in her very small voice; “I’m here, but I’ve changed, you’ve grown me and the me I was is now the you that you are that you have made me into today.” It made me believe that I need to cease hiding myself and just be me.

It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood; who strives valiantly; who errs, who comes short again and again, because there is no effort without error and shortcoming; but who does actually strive to do the deeds; who knows great enthusiasms, the great devotions; who spends himself in a worthy cause; who at the best knows in the end the triumph of high achievement, and who at the worst, if he fails, at least fails while daring greatly, so that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who neither know victory nor defeat.

~Teddy Roosevelt

Create Your Own Happy! Pt 1

Have you ever wondered from where happiness comes, how it begins or why we’re entitled to it? My belief is we must each create our own happy.

Honor your integrity

Some days this is exactly how I feel…and that isn’t necessarily a bad thing! A good day is any day when one is swung at, yet able to walk away without countering.

To be empowered, you must hold yourself to a higher power

Dance with your heart

It is my sincere hope, my desire and my dream to always dance to the beat of my drum. To hear the music playing if only in my head. To allow the beauty of what I hear, what I see and what I feel be passed to those who are unable to move to rhythmic vibrations that grow from deep within the pit of my body causing my pulse to race, my face to flush and my heart to pound until I’m certain that the next beat will cause it leap outside of my chest.

I move as I speak with the integrity of my determination and a belief in tomorrow and your voice is mute to me.

Scar Tissue Never Really Goes Away…

I saw this quote and instantly the words struck a cord within me. I find it funny peculiar how the universe times things to show up at just the right instance, for me this was one of those.

HURT…remains long after the wound has recovered, even after the pain is no more and the actions have long passed on being only a faint memory to those involved. However, there is always someone for whom this “scar tissue” remains as it is never truly gone away.

Long beyond the recovered abrasions, the insistent and aching pain, the memory of the malignant words, the actions and the intentional hurt of a particular moment remains as keen and clear as the day it occurred.

Protected by my mind, yet driven by my heart; I choose to speak the words upon my heart and smirk at people who toss random quotes of “forgiveness” at me. Replying in my sugar sweet manner…”forgiveness ain’t for everyone.” In my world forgiveness begins with sincerity, stemming from acknowledgement of having committed a wrong…a hurt.

*Forgiveness is a growth of positivity established, earned and shared between the parties involved.

There are moments in life “once in a life time” moments that can never be relived, never again enjoyed, never savored in their truest form of love and bliss. It is these such moments that when ruined by the shear pettiness of others that I refuse to extend my heart in forgiveness and that’s a decision that I can live with.